As If I Never Said Goodbye
by DarrenCrisstastic
Summary: Kurt Hummel is the male tribute from District 7. Instead of fighting he decides to let them kill him without a fight but then Blaine Anderson saves his life...
1. Chapter 1

AN: Okay I began this story because first, I love Glee and Klaine and second because I couldn't take it any longer that other authors had fun killing Blaine in their stories. There will still die some of my tributes but I won't tell who. This is a Klaine ff crossed with The Hunger Games but only original Glee characters will be in this story, no OCs and no THGCs!

I don't own Glee, Klaine or The Hunger Games but I call the THG book copies on my bookshelf in English and German my own and the movie extra books too. Sometimes I lend them to my mother but they are mine and I mark them everyday with my love.

* * *

So, here I am. In the Capitol. The girl next to me, the other tribute from my district, what was her name? Terri? Tara? Oh, right. It was Tina. She looks a bit sick but still tries to smile for the people around us. But everyone could see that she was crying from inside. I wonder if I can bet with the mentors how many days, hours or minutes it will take until she brakes down.

The breakfast was great. I never ate this much before in my life. It's good that I won't die starving. Since that short woman drawed my name I am thinking about how I will die. I feel like I should protest and not fight. It's not possible for me to win this game anyway and I hate violence. Someone huge like that Azimio guy or the Karofsky dude will win I watched the recap of the reapings yesterday and these volunteered or this girl Lauren. Oh gosh, she could kill me without even blinking.

Kurt Hummel - Killed by a girl - without fight. Shame for my district. But that doesn't matter for me. I told my father I will most likely not fight and die like I lived - peacefuly, a pacifist. He just nodded, hugged and let me go. The tears in his eyes were visible but he didn't let them flow. That's my dad, always staying strong for his family, for his son. He loved me.

My "big" brother, Finn, said I could make it. I just have to try. I am great, he told me and that made my eyes mist. We don't talk much even if we love each other brotherly. I am a misfit and he is someone everyone adores. It's good that it was my name and not his I think.

I tried so hard to stay strong but then there was Carole, she cried. She said that she is now losing the second man to the Hunger Games. Finn's father died there too. Carole was 16 and pregnant and Finns father 18. His last year. He didn't made it. Some years after Burt, my father took her and Finn in. Mom was still alive back then but after she got sick and died dad married Carole and Finn and me became brothers. It's not like Burt had an affair with Carole, no. My mom, Elizabeth and Carole were pregnant at the same time and became best friends and Finn grew so fast and Carole couldn't feed them alone anymore. There was no way we would have watched them starving to death.

I am a bit older than Finn but we are still the same age and he behaves like the 'big brother'. It's calming to know that from next year on there won't be any possibilities he will be in the games. He will be 19. He will be safe.

I told Carole to stay strong. They are all safe now. Nothing will happen to them and that they have to live on. I made her laugh when I told her I will eat and celebrate in the Capitol until I puke. Hopefuly on someone fancy I added.

I am happy that no one volunteered for me. I am lucky that I don't have to watch someone nicer, someone braver than I am to die for me. That would be much worse than just standing on the metal circle and waiting for death.

The people in the capitol are all nice and wave at us or want to touch us. All the lights make me feel so important and loved so every smile I return is honest and full of love. Rachel Berry the escort from the Capitol who comes to my district since the last 4 years to read out the name of the reapings approach me from behind.

"Kurt?" She whispers in my ear. I turn around and watch her biting her bottom lip.

"Yes?"

"Say, that tall guy back in District 7," she begins and makes big eyes.

"What's with him?" I ask.

"He is your brother?"

"Stepbrother." I say with a warm smile.

"Oh," she says while blushing. "What-What's his name?"

I have to giggle a bit. I never heard of a romance between someone from the Capitol and someone from a district.

"His name is Finn Hudson."

She nodds and then some of her rosy color vanishes from her face. "How," she begins.

"How?" My smile falters.

"Ehm..." She gulps.

"What is it Rachel?" I ask her and narrow my eyebrows at her. She looks sick. I take her hand reassuring and try to give her a calming pat on her back.

"How old is he?" She asks quietly after some deep breathes.

"Oh." I chew on my upper lip. "We are the same age. Next year he will be 19." I get back my smile and feel a bit happy for Finn after there is relieve visible on Rachel's face.

"Hey!" I look to my left and see the female mentor from my district approaching us. Mercedes Jones. She won 3 years ago and is something like maybe my only friend. She is one year older than me and I cried everyday while she was gone. It was all big coincidence that she won back then but I was more than happy that she survived. Everyone was afraid of her because of her attitude back at the training camp and the interview. And after the 60 seconds on the metal circles she just ran and ran and ran. It was the shortest Hunger Games ever. There weren't any alliances and everyone else left killed each other right there at the Cornucopia. It didn't even take half a day until the last person bleed out and died. I was so happy, she won out of coincidence, out of luck but she won! She. came. back. home.!

"Okay. Kurt, Tina the Remake Centre awaits you and Rachel, Mike and me will... talk to some sponsors." She look intensly at us. Then she lock eyes with me for a second. "We will try our best for you two. Try your best now, too." I swallow the lump in my throat down and begin to stare at my feet. She knows that I already gave up. I told her yesterday when we layed in my bed in the cabin. "Now go and don't forget your stylist knows best!" Some Peacekeepers escort us to a clinic and Tina and me get seperated. Some people from my prep team bring me to a tub, get me naked and wash me. They talk to me and admire my body and how much my stylist will like me but I am not really listening. I am thinking about Mercedes how hard this all here must be for her and about Finn and Rachel. Maybe these are perfect for each other but I know how Finn thinks. He will hate Rachel and everyone from here after I am dead and Rachel will take over another district and they will never get a real chance to get to know each other or maybe love each other, they could be destined for each other but they will never know. I sigh.

I am a total romantic, I loved it when dad found more in Carole as only a friend. I saw their love blossom and I was so happy for them. I am happy for everyone when they find love and happiness. I never looked for those things myself. I was just... I was just, I am just different. And now it doesn't matter anymore. I will be dead in a few days.

The prep team finish me rather fast to their own surprise. They tell me just to wait until my stylist will come to me but that it will take a lot of time because no one thought they would be so fast. I feel like they were thinking about turning an ugly beast into a handsome prince but they got me and now don't have much to do except admiring my pore free skin.

I sit down half nake only white briefs covering my private parts and wait. I still wait over an hour later and maybe another hour after this too and my stilist haven't arrived yet. I sigh impatient and think about to take a look around at the other prep teams. Normally I am too well behave to just stroll around but I am totally bored and thought I would get a bit more entertainment in the Capitol. But no, no one is here to watch me or to keep me company no one from my team and no Peacekeeper.

A bit nervous I begin to look around. I find rather fast Tina, her prep team is cutting her hair and her skin looks red, free from hair and sore. Poor girl, I think. I see other girls with the same problems and can't stop myself to feel sorry for all of them. I see Karofsky and his prep team , they are plucking his eyebrows and he is crying silently. Must hurt being hairy.

I hear someone shouting and when I turn around I see Lauren Zizes from District 2 like Karofsky she is about to punch some guy from her prep team but then they are finally some Peacekeepers who hold her back. She screams, "Get away from my legs with that glue!"

Okay, I think, one girl will still have her body hair after the parade.

I listen to someone laugh behind me and a boy tribute I didn't pay much attention before to appears at my left side. Like me he is only wearing white briefs. He is looking at me like at a friend and I feel uncomfortable because of it but I still can't take my eyes away from him. The soft dark hair on his well build chest and the toned arms and defined muscles. His body looks really good but what I like the most are his eyes. They are shiny like the sun and they remember me of maplesyrup. I like his dark curls too, they looks so jumpy and make him look so young. I wonder why I didn't notice him while watching the recap last night.

"Hey," he says.

I look at him some heartbeats longer and then turn around go away without saying a word. I don't need to talk to someone who is one of my potential muderers.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: As If I Never Said Goodbye

Category 1: Hunger Games

Category 2: Glee

Character(s): Kurt H.

Chapter 2 Title: Chapter 2

Words: 2,484

Genre(s): Romance/Adventure

Rating: Rated: T

Summary: Kurt Hummel is the male tribute from District 7. Instead of fighting

he decides to let them kill him without a fight but then Blaine Anderson saves

his life...

AN: Okay, welcome to chapter 2! I told you in the chapter before that I will only use GCs and no THGCs and no OCs for my story. I didn't plan everything through before and when I was planning the characters the other day I realized that Glee doesn't have many female charas… that's why I did use some of Vocal Adrenaline, too but that's not relevant now. In this chapter it's about Kurt and his stylist. I made something, so you could better imagine how his stylist looks like. darrencrisstastic(.)tumblr(.)com/post/21338951005/brittany-in-my-glee-thg-ff-as-kurts-stylist

* * *

When I get back, I see a tall woman, okay more like still a tall girl waiting for me. Her long, blond hair is wild and curly and reminds me of a bush. She wears green glitter eye shadow and blood red lip stick and her cheeks are golden and I can't take my eyes away from her white artificial cat ears. They are moving excited at my sight, the girl jumps to me and hugs me tight.

"Oh gosh, you are perfect," she says with a lovely voice. I adore her yellow, green dress that expose the best parts of her body. She is radiating with emotions and colors and I am stunned by her looks.

"Thank you," I reply quietly.

"You're welcome!" She is beaming at me and then touches me, first my chest, belly, then her hands flow to my back. I feel her finger nails scraping over my shoulder blades. "Okay, get naked!" She says. I open my mouth in shock and close it again and then back to open it.

"Pardon?" I ask.

"Get naked! I need to see all of you." She turns away from me and grabs for a notebook and a pencil and begins to write or draw down something.

I cough a bit emberassed and push the briefs down. She looks up from her notebook and her cat ears begin to shake, she glance down at me and then circle around me in fast steps. I feel her hand gliding over my ass cheeks and feel more than really uncomfortable about her touching me there.

"Like I said, 'perfect'," she mumbles to herself. "I forgot," she says after circling around me 3 more times. "I am Brittany, your stylist and we will have so much fun!" She jumps up and down like a little child.

I nod at her. "I am Kurt Hummel," I answer in good manner.

"I know." Is her only reply. She is back at scribbling down in her notebook and I watch her quietly.

"Okay," she says after a while, "You can wear that." She points to a bodysuit that lays on a chair. I go over and try to fit in it. Wow, it's skin tight. I never wore something like that before but it feels good. "It suits you. You look so-hot!" I think, that was meant as a compliment. "Let's go eat something before the opening," she says.

* * *

While we are waiting for our lunch Brittany talks the whole time. She is really funny but in a cute, naive way, I would say, she is remarkable.

"-So I told Lord Tubbingdon, I can't marry him. I love someone else, even if I see this person only once a year."

"Oh wow, your cat must be jealous," I add conversational.

"He is!" She laughs loud and I smirk at her. "He totally is. Everytime we are making out he comes between us and purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrs. It's not nice, I told him several times to leave me alone when I am with my Darling but he is always fighting." She pouts and I can only think of how cute and innocent she is. Brittany is my favourite person of all the people I met until right now in the Capitol. I wonder if the other tributes like their stylists too or if Brittany and me are the exception.

They dish our meal and I smell the delicious scent of potage.

"Carrots?" I ask her. I am so hungry at this moment that my mouth flows over with saliva and I can't wait to finally dig in. She nodds and we begin to eat in silence for a while. After the potage follows chop from an animal I never taste before. At home I don't eat meat often. It is always chewy so I give my piece most of the times Finn. But this here, is soft and melts on my tongue. I didn't know before that meat can melt but it does and for the first time I understand the appeal of meat. For desert we have a chocolate pudding. I never eat chocolate before but now in this pudding, I feel like I am in heaven because I never taste something so delicous before in my whole life. I decide in silence that chocolate is my new favourite thing from now on.

"So here we are," introduces Brittany. "You are here in the Capitol, your costume is ready, we only have to see if it fits perfectly."

I gulp. Right. The costume. The parade. The Hunger Games. Just for a short time I forgot why I am here in the Capitol and the why I ate all these delicous things. "Okay," my voice trembles slightly and Brittany notices it. She catches my hands in tight grips and locks eyes with me.

"Are you afraid?" She asks almost not audible.

I nod, like I am saying 'yes' but say, "I don't know," instead. Her grip tightens again and I feel like my skin is bruising. There is a thin coat of sweat on her hands, it cools my overheated skin.

"You don't need to be afraid," Brittany sounds like she means it.

"Aren't you afraid of the death?" I look deep in her green eyes but can't find anything but kindness and trust in there in this moment.

"No, I don't have to and you too, don't have to." She tells me.

"Why?"

"Because, I like you!"

"What?"

"I like you," she explaines. "That's why you don't have to be afraid to die because you won't die. 'You understand?"

I ask again, "What?"

She shifts over to me and hugs me tight, again. Brittany whispers in my ear, "You don't have to be afraid. You won't die because I like you. People I like won't die. I know because Santana survived and is alive and visits me every year. I would visit her in District 11, too but she said I can't and she can only visit me once a year but I like her, so it's okay." Brittany laughed again but I heard her voice getting thick with emotions.

So Brittany is in love with Santana Lopez, the victor from the Hunger Games 5 years ago if I am correct. I remember her. She was sly and young. Santana took from the Cornucopia what she could reach at arm length and ran and hid until it dawned. 10 kids already dyed at the Cornucopia and over 7 days long Santana moved at night, slid the throats of her victims open and watched them bleed out from afar until she heard the canon shots to tell her they are dead. She was succesful.

"So you were the stylist for District 11 before," I conclude.

"Yes, I was but I got a better district because she won and the people liked her dresses."

I shift uncomfortable in Brittany's arms. So she's only my stylist because she gained profit of one of her tributes before. Brittany is like everyone else. Works with almost dead kids and robe us in glitter and velvet. I realize that Brittany like many other citizens of the Capitol doesn't understand the concept of death. She works in a cruel and cold place and overshadows it with beauty so people won't see that they kill humans year after year. No, they don't kill them. They let them kill each other and just have fun watching them hurting and dying and killing. I get silent and shut myself off. Brittany watches me quietly, I feel like she is in her own thoughts, too.

* * *

"Okay, it's time," says Brittany many silent minutes later. She pushs me up from my seat and lead me to a room where the prep team waits for us. I sit down and they begin to apply make up. I think back to the male tributes the years before it's not often that the stylists decide to let them wear make up and most of the times they would look like clowns or monster. Oh god, please don't make me look like a clown, I plea. Most of the time the tributes came from District 8, I always felt sorry for them.

Brittany vanishes and comes back with my costume. It's a nice suit in earthy colours but I can't see in which way it resembles my district.

After I am clothed, Brittany takes my hand and brings me to a mirror. It's the first time I see myself since the prep team laid their hands on me.

I never thought of me as ugly but I never thought of me as that beautiful or handsome as before this moment. Without a word I took myself in in the mirror. My hair was coiffed back, and my face was smooth and pale with strong, swift brown and bronze lines around my eyes. They make me older but my eyes look like a deep blue lake in the evening rounded by a forrest. My suit is fabulous! I never wore a suit before and never saw a tribute wear a suit for the opening ceremony either. It is brown and cream and the lights in the room change its color shades with every move I make.

I turn to Brittany. My mouth is dry and my eyes wet. Everything bad I thought about her before vanished the moment I saw myself in the mirror. "Thank You," I say with a scratchy voice. She smiles brightly at me and begins to circle around me again.

Her eyes are taking in every part of me and my clothes. "Perfect," she says after a while, "We don't have to change anything." She pauses and looks at my chest. "Except one." She turns away from me and walks over to a table, grabs something and comes back to me. She pins something on my breast pocket and I look down to see what it is. "It's a leaf," She tells me. "Now you are perfect." I look at the leaf. It's wonderful. It's made of glas and shimmers transparent green in the light. It remembers me of the moment when you walk through the woods and the sun shines down, you look up and through the leafes you feel the warm burn on your skin.

* * *

Later on we meet with Tina and her Stylist, Jeff, down on the bottom level of the remake centre, the other tributes already loading into their chariots. The chariots are pulled by horses, 4 horses for each chariot. I see mostly white or black horses some of them with paint on them. They all look beautiful and unrealistic like everything here in the Capitol but our chariot is pulled by different ones, a white , black, a brown and one that resembles more a cow. I am not even sure if it's a horse but I like it, it's different, it's a misfit like myself.

I try not to look at Tina so much but I can't stop myself. Her dress is beautiful, green and brown silk partly tied around her body and crystal leafes hanging down from her body like from a weeping willow. I love her make up. She wears matching blue eye contacts to my eyes and her eyes are rounded by the same brown and bronze lines like mine. Her arms and chest is covered with a green and golden powder. With her still sad expression, she looks like the real weeping willow, her whole being crys melancholy.

I am not the only one who can't stop looking at her. Mike the other mentor, can't take his eyes off of her himself. I smirk knowingly at him and think back to my bet, if he likes her I can't bet when she will break down. He would surely try to beat the crap out of me.

I don't know Tina really good but maybe she will survive like Mercedes did and maybe her shy image is just a facade and so on and so on. I should stop making all these stories for other people up in my mind.

The music for the opening begins and everyone is hurrying to their designated place. Around us is the noise of the clip-clop of the horses and our chariot begins to move. In front of us are the 6 tributes. The chariot in front of me contains a pair of blond tributes. I think their names was Jesse and Quinn. The chariot in front of them maintains the tributes from District 5, I can see the boy who tried to talk to me in the Remake Centre. His broad back is shining in gold and he resembles a light bulb.

We enter the city and the crowds are shouting our names just as loud as for the 6 tributes in front of us and the 5 behind us. Everywhere is light and glitter and shouts and noises. It's overwhelming and my heart beat is too fast to be healthy. For one moment, I think of my family, they are sitting at home, watching me at this one moment. They see how good I look like everyone else does and I can't hide the large grin on my face. I wink at people and flirt and laugh and again, in this moment, I feel loved by the people around me, so every gesture , smile and wave I return is honest and full of emotions. Look at me, I think, look what Brittany did for me, made me be. A little voice in the back of my head whispers with every second louder, I am a star.

We reach the center of the city. In front of us waits the president of Panem ready for her speech, Sue Sylvester.


	3. Chapter 3

AN:It took me really long to write this chapter but I finished it and that's what counts. Sadly I am not satisfied with this chapter, especially the beginning. I really want to bring a bit of the charm of the THG books in it, like with the elevator and so but I am often confused thanks to the movie that's spooking in my head, that's why I am always consulting the book or the tribute special books and so on. Oh and I read it first in German and then in English that complicets it too... Please review and thanks for reading!

* * *

"Welcome, Tributes!" President Sue raises her hands above her head, let them glide down to her lectern and let them rest there while she continues her speech. Her mouth moves forward to the microphone watching the 24 teens in front of her. She smiles and a cold shiver runs through my body. Instead of President Sylvester, people call her President Sue. People always think of her as nice and loving with great plans for Panem's future but I never saw anything like that. Her eyes spoke 100000 of tales of murders and cruelty, no matter how much she smiled at the camera her eyes were always colder than ice, holes filled with emotionless desires and targets, I think.

I don't listen anymore to her speech, what happened in the past of Panem and why I and others have to be sacrificed year after year and how proud our districts are of us. All bullshit.

If they are so proud, why is my- are the families crying at home? My hands form fists at the thought and the smile I had before for the people in the Capitol dissappears at the sight of Panem's President. She waves at us and dismisses us to the Trainings Center.

* * *

The chariots begin to move again and all the tributes vanishs into the Trainings Center. We step out the chariot. I give Tina my hand while she she steps down the little stairs so she won't lose her balance in her stunning dress . Mercedes, Mike, Rachel, Brittany and Jeff are already waiting for us.

"You looked fantastic!" Says Rachel to us clapping her hands as if we just did much more than to blow kisses and wave at people while trying to hold our balance.

I smirk at her knowingly. Mercedes lays her arms around me in a tight embrace. "They loved you," she whispers in my left ear. I can't stop the dopey grin that's forming on my face at the thought how thouthends of people shouted and cried my name to get just a bit of my attention.

"Yes," I answer her.

We are going to the elevators, Brittany and Mercedes link their arms with me on the way and while they chatter like 2 wild geese I try to listen to Mike, Tina and Jeff behind me. Jeff is mostly silent and Tina only nodds to everything that Mike says, while Mike makes a drivelling idiot of himself with sweet talk and wooing about how beautiful and gracious she looks.

Oh, he got it bad, I think. Again, I feel sorry for him if Tina won't survive.

In front of the elevator we meet other tributes and their teams. Mostly every team is silent at the moment still stunned about the experience of the opening ceremony. I try to sort every tribute to their district and what their names was but most of them I can't even remember. There are Jesse and Quinn again from District 6, the boy from District 5 whose name I can't remember but talked to me and the girl tribute, Dave Karofsky and Lauren Zizes from District 2, I remember their full names because I am most afraid of these two. Then there a the two tributes from District 3-

"Out of my way!" I hear someone shouting behind me. I turn around and see the two tributes from District 1. "Don't touch me, dead meat," the girl says. I look at her in disbelieve. Did she just said 'dead meat'? "What are you looking at?" She asks me while she trys to push past me.

"Nothing," I tell her quietly.

"Good," she smirks and steps in front of one of he elevator doors. "Because you and everyone else will die, you know? Don't get your hopes high up. My father is rich and will sponsor all his money to get me back alive."

Some of the tributes laugh at her. She sends everyone of them death stares. I am not laughing, my face is blank because, who knows? Everything is possible in the arena and money will sure help her.

She looks at me again to see if I laughed at her, too. She smiles at my expressionless gaze and mumbles, "I like you. Maybe I will let you live a bit longer, alliances and that stuff," before cutting the line and getting with her team in the elevator.

At my left side pass Azimio, he mutters, "You are so dead," in the girl tribute's direction. I try to remember her name.

"Something wit 'S'," I mumble to myself.

"You mean Sugar?" I look to the side that was vacant 1 minute back and find the male District 5 tribute talking to me again.

I am not answering but he continues chatting. "My name is Blaine," he introduces himself. I only nod once. "…And you are Kurt, right?" Again, I don't answer. I try to get a bit of distance between us and move to Mercedes side and take her hand. Blaine who followed me, looks at mine and Mercedes intertwined hands for a moment. "Are you mute?" He asks me with a worried expression. I look at Mercedes pleadingly and roll my eyes.

"He isn't," she answers for me with a full teath smile.

"And why won't he answer me?" Blaine turns to Mercedes after realizing that he have better chances getting my answers out of her.

"Because he don't want to. He never talks if he feels like the person isn't worth it." She gives the tribute- Blaine- a small charming and somehow 'knowing' smirk. "I think you can sympathize why he don't feel like talking."

Blaine nodds with a vacant gaze then leans towards me. "You look really, really good District 7," he tells me quietly into my ear. I gasp. Shit. "And when you smile like I saw on the TV screens even more." No matter how much I try not to, I blush slightly, avoiding his eyes when he tries to read my face.

The next elevator is mine, I decide. I push him aside, ignoring his attempt or whatever that was and tag Mercedes along with me. The others follow and Rachel pushs the button for the 7th floor. Through the crystal clear elevator doors and floor I observe Blaine watching me, I conclude, maybe his eyes are on one of the persons beside me but I doubt that though, I hold my gaze on him until he is smaller than an ant.

* * *

The doors open and for the first time I see the huge apartment. The whole floor is for Tina and me and our team. Rachel begins to talk and explain everything, what where is and what we have to do and our whole schedule and many more without even breathing. I begin to walk around, taking in the details of the spatial arrangment and wonder which my room is because I would really just like to be alone and rest.

"I need to rest and freshen up," I tell them.

"But I am not finished-" begins Rachel.

"Please," I interrupt her.

With thin tight pressed lips she points at a door. "That's your room. Dinner is at 6."

Without a word I bolt into my room leaving everyone behind. I lock the door. There is no need to talk to Mercedes now.

* * *

The whole room is blue and metallic. There is a couch with a table, a kingsize bed with blue silver bedding, an extra room that must be my personal bathroom, I miss the TV, I always imagined to have everything here and now I am disappointed that the Capitol won't even give us a TV. I go over to my bed and jump on it directly landing on my face. I turn on my side and look for a lamp on the nightstand. Instead I find something like a really huge remote control. I take it and press randomly some buttons. The curtains part automatically and present enourmos windows, somewhere from the walls starts playing music, my blanket begins to heat, a TV comes out of a wall and shows the recap of the Opening Ceremony and shows Lauren looking straight into the camera not even blinking or smiling.

"Okay, what did I press?" I ask myself. In the next scene they show Blaine without even looking I find the button to shut off the TV. Everything is now silent around me. I can't hear the others from outside, maybe they killed Rachel or she died because of the lack of oxygen BECAUSE she couldn't shut up.

I feel tired and my arms and legs begin to hurt but I sit up and try to walk to the bathroom. Everything is white here except for the mirror and... I love it. There isn't any other way to say it, I just really love it. I never had something like this before, I never saw something like this before. The whole city is like that but the bathroom is the first thing that makes me finally feel it. The Capitol is like another world. It doesn't give me a feeling of home and nothing is familiar for me but that's exactly what I like. I feel like I dreamed of this and didn't even know it before that I wanted this, that I desire to live such a lifestyle. I never wanted to live a life like my father or Finn, going in to the woods everyday and devour the rest of my life to a job as lumberjack or carpenter or you could say I never want to work with lumber. I am the best student at my school but I am small and thin, the most guys in our district looks like Finn tall, heavy, more muscle than brain but my cleverness won't bring me any money where I live.

Now that I can see what other people can do, they can wear what they want, they can do what they want, they can be what they want, I am certainly sure that I never ever want to work with lumbs. Never!

I take my time to further discover this room and feel myself drawn to the shower and it's million options. Instead of randomly pushing buttons I try to discover carefully what magic powers my new toy got.

I press the top button and the shower begins to work. Down from it are options how and where the water will spray at you, red and blue buttons for hotter and colder, '+' and '-' for more or less water, different patterns for rose scent, lemon soup, bubble bath, mud bath, mountain quell, lavender scent and many more. I am so fascinated by this that I can't resist and decide to take a shower for real.

We have a shower at home too but the water is almost freezing, so normally I prefer a warm bath more. I set the water on a luke warm temperature with different fruit scents.

"Heaven," I sigh contently after stripping off my clothes and stepping in on the wet tiles.

* * *

Just warming up, no thinking, no worries, just being and relaxing, I step out after a whole hour in the shower playing with the buttons.

I find a bathrobe, put in on and go back to my bedroom.

The warm shower gave me the rest, I am in a huge and desperate need of sleep and flow to my bed.

I sink down, cover myself under the blankets and greet the immediate sleep with a small sigh.


End file.
